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Swirling with Christelyn Karazin

The art of attraction isn't just about colour or creed, it's about chemistry and a whole bunch of other things. Swirling author Christelyn Karazon discusses.

Match.com Says 35% of New Marriages Happening Online

Posted by Christelyn, 25 Jul

Online behemoth Match.com recently announced at the annual “Singles in America” study by Match Group the 35% of marriages occur online. This is huge. Just 12 years ago it was 3%. What is more, 600 million people are online, and projections say another 100 million are coming. That’s a lot of potential interracial dating and marriage on the horizon.

The study also revealed some pretty interesting trends. Seventy-two percent of men say they like it when a woman offers to split the tab. Most men don’t really expect you to, but they believe it’s a considerate gesture to offer. Come to think of it, offering to split the bill could lend some interesting intel on the type of guy you’re dealing with while making the woman not appear to be only out for a free meal.

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If a guy takes you up on the offer to split the check, you might surmise that he would be more likely to think ya’ll should go halvsies forever and ever amen. If he always insists on paying, that is a good indicator that he enjoys being the provider. Another idea comes to mind about this too–if you’re not into the guy, you should DEFINITELY offer to pay the bill to stave off any potential assumption of a physical payoff.

Either way, it’s always a good idea to have enough money on you to cover the bill and cab fare home just in case the whole date turns for the worse.

One side-eye worthy tidbit has to do with today’s men basically wanting women to do all the pursuing, under the guise of “empowerment.”

Men are leading the way in forging our new dating rituals. Single men are overwhelmingly in favor of women initiating the first kiss (95%), as well as initiating sex for the first time (93%). The vast majority of men are also pleased if a woman asks for a man’s phone number (95%), and is the first to call after a good first date (94%). Yet few women initiate the first kiss (29%); few initiate sex for the first time (23%); and few ask a guy for his phone number (13%).

But then, these same men also want you to assume the feminine, motherly role, as evidenced here…

So…let me get this straight. Today’s men want women to offer to pay for dates, initiate the first kiss and sex, ask for numbers, and STILL take care of them when they’re sick. Wow. I’m feeling so much more empowered now, you know, that we’re in this new egalitarian society.

What, exactly, are the men doing now?

Christelyn Karazin is the co-author of Swirling: How to Date, Mate and Relate, Mixing Race, Culture and Creed. She also operates the popular blog, Beyond Black & White, and operate the first forum dedicated to black women interested and/or involved in interracial relationships.